A Good Life

Marvin Stanley Plotkin passed yesterday.    He was beloved by his daughters.  He was a faithful husband.  He loved airplanes and military ceremonies and honors.  He lived a long life but also did suffer at the end from the diseases of diabetes, cancer, and the heart.   He was fortunate to die in his sleep, with his daughter in his home.  The same home that he lived in for the past six decades.

  

What is a good life?  Everyone has joys and sorrows and moments of elation.  We all try to do good for others and perform acts of kindness.  We might not be the valedictorian of the class and win science fairs, but we probably had more fun chasing butterflies and collecting stamps and coins.   A good life is one of love, and Marvin loved his wife and daughters.   He found it hard to express in his earlier years, but I most remember his words to Joan and to Aryln and to Janet,  "I love you…have a good time"

Marvin lost his dad at a young age.  He always longed to be a part of a brotherhood that a father and son relationship might engender.  I think the military was in a sense a kind of father that he did not have.   Marvin suffered from a seizure disorder from his young adult years.  I recall that he drove his new Mercury Cougar into a home.  The house's porch was destroyed but the Cougar emerged with only scratches.  Having a medical condition that conflicted with his military desires must have been difficult-- a medical condition that would excuse him from pursuing long term military honors.   A seizure disorder that might at times jumble his brain and make the world a little fuzzier.

 

My best memory of Marvin is his birthday at Gus's Mariner restaurant at Virginia Beach shortly after Joan and I met.    He loved seafood.  His joy was infectious.   He had the pure happiness of someone who is never unencumbered by guilt.    Joan's best memory is Marvin at the Deltaville's Ullmann Sails sock burning oyster festival at the beginning of the sailing season last year.   On a sunny yet chilly Spring Day,  the warm fire, the happy sailors, the promise of the new season, coalesced into slurping a perfectly roasted Oyster.  Life is good.  Life is elemental.  These moments are fleeting but preserved in our crystalline memory.

 

Marvin was a fortunate man.  He was beloved by his daughters.  He was a transformed Republican who voted for Biden and knew that Biden won this election.  I have never heard him raise his voice in anger.  He had poor hearing so practiced selective hearing to his advantage.  He had a terrible disease of lung cancer and received wonderful care at his beloved VAMC.   The treatment caused his Right Heart to fail.  He suffered.   He was supposed to move to our house on the day he died, but I think he, in a way, loved being at his home and did not want to leave.    He was at his castle.  He raised his daughters and married them off at Farmington Drive.   He was the major, the captain of his home.

 

What is a good life?   Every life is precious.  Every moment is fleeting.  What remains are faith, love, and family.  Faith in God or life force or goodwill.  Faith in oneself that we can finish the race or complete a demanding task.   Faith in the goodness of people.   Faith in love.   

 

We all love.   Love of our partners and children, grandchildren, and greatgrandchildren and brethren.  Love of community, people, and country.  Love of nature.  Love of our pets like Waverly and Cupcake and Ginny.  We all have faith and love in family.

 

Family is the bond that strengthens our place on earth.  Family is the most complex of all demands and emotions but the most elemental and strong and simple bond.   

 

Marvin Stanley Plotkin had a good life.  He had faith, love and he has family.  We will miss you Marvin.  You will be remembered in a place of honor in our hearts.